I Have No Idea What in the Hell is Going On (12/3/06)-
Exactly one week ago today, I got fired because I couldn't find the cheese. Caterina had told me to grate some parmesan cheese up for dinner and I didn't see the wedge of parmesan nestled in with the other 21343697 kinds of cheese the Sonninos keep in a plastic tupperware container in the fridge. After Caterina successfully found the cheese herself, she says to me “Jimmy, when I tell you to find the cheese, you keep looking until you find the cheese! You know what? I think that after Christmas, you just don't come back.”
And that was that. The ironic part is that literally 10 minutes after this happened, Caterina couldn't find the brand new stick of butter laying in plain sight in the door of the refridgerator, but unlike not being able to find the cheese, not finding butter is a completely understandable mistake that anyone could make. But that is neither here nor there. The point is, she told me to not come back and I am actually pretty OK with that. It's not like this job is the best thing that's ever happened to me. But that was back when things were simple. I formulated a great plan. I was going to buy a one-way ticket home leaving on the 16th of December (Caterina wanted me to stay until the 22nd, but there's no way I'm paying several hundred extra dollars to make her happy...), and I would just search as hard as I could for a new job from now until the day my flight leaves. If I find something else, great, I'll take it and be ecstatic. If not, well then I'll have to go home and think of something else to do.
Tuesday night, after I'd cooked dinner and cleaned up from dinner and put the kids to bed and helped Leone with his homework and cleaned up all the messes they'd made in the living room and computer room, and straightened the cushions on the couch (Caterina has rage blackouts if the cushions aren't straight) and prepared a tray of cereal and biscuits and fresh fruit and bowls and spoons for the next morning so that I could focus all my energy in the morning into dragging Leone from his bed, Caterina casually asks me if I would take the kids to school the next day and then come back to the house to help the cleaning lady do her job. Now, normally, I do this kind of thing all the time. Not because it's my job but because I was foolish enough to think that if I broke my back working for Caterina maybe she'd actually be happy with me. However, having been fired for not finding the cheese, I wasn't much in the mood to work 11 or 12 hour days anymore. My attitude was basically “To hell with this job and this crazy woman.” So... I told her no. I told her that it's not my job to help the cleaning lady clean, which is true. It's only my job to clean up after myself and the kid's immediate messes (I didn't know this until a few days ago when I asked Anna, the lady who found me this job, what exactly was written in my contract about my work. She said I wasn't responsible for cleaning the house everyday or for cleaning/ironing/putting away the children's clothes. I've been helping the cleaning lady clean almost everyday for the past month instead of spending the school hours in Florence like I was promised I'd be able to before I came here). I told her that I had been working 11 and 12 hour days without breaks or thank you's, and that I had the work log I'd created a few weeks ago to prove it. I told her that I felt abused, exploited, and unappreciated. I told her that she never made one single effort to make me feel like a part of the family, that she didn't do anything for my birthday, that she never invited me along on family trips. She didn't even tell me when the family dog died, a dog that I had been caring for, taking to the vet everyday, holding him up so he could use the bathroom and eat (because he was too weak to do on his this on his own) for his last dying weeks. I told her that I hadn't had more than a few scattered, random days in Florence in the past month and a half, and that I needed the day in Florence to find a job before she ruined my life. Finally, after all this she screamed "FINE! Stay in Florence for the day!!" and stomped off like a little girl whose parents wouldn't buy her the lollipop she wanted.
Then things got really weird. I had a nice day in Florence, I saw this amazing church, Santa Maria Novella, and ate at Mesopotamia Kebab, the best kebabs this side of the Euphrates. It was a great day, but I was expecting to come home to find my suitcase on the street in front of the house. Instead, everything was eerily calm. I managed to avoid Caterina for most of the day. Then, that night after I'd made dinner and was cleaning up all the dishes, Alessandro approaches me. He says “Jimmy, you work really hard for this family. How about a raise? How does 700 euro per month instead of 500 sound?” I told him it sounded terrible and he laughed and I was left bewildered, but, for the first time since I've been here, feeling really appreciated. However, I am now too untrusting of this family to just take the interaction for face value. I think that either a) Caterina doesn't remember firing me (rage blackout) and the threat of me finding a new job made them realize that with Frank, Darshani, and me all gone, they would actually have to do things for themselves which is a fate worse than death so they offered me a bribe to stay, b) Alessandro actually meant what he said and they didn't realize how hard I'd been working until I screamed it at Caterina, or c) they wanted to intice me to stick around until they could find a replacement. I think it's some combination of A and C. But at the moment, I didn't care. It's a considerable raise!
Then, on Saturday morning, I woke up at 9 am to help around the house, even though Saturday is supposed to be something of a day off (but really it's like “Jimmy, do this and this and take Leone to his friend's house and then once he's gone you can do whatever you want”), I was feeling helpful and I knew that if Leone and his friend who had spent the night had to make their own cereal there would be hell to pay, day off or not. So I woke up, cleaned my bathroom and bedroom, made breakfast for the boys, helped Leone with his homework, took out the trash, fed Rosa (don't get me started on how ridiculously well the dog eats. Feeding her doesn't consist of pouring dog food into a bowl like it does everywhere else in the world. Let's just say it involves pots, pans, and raw hamburger meat which has to be bought from the butcher every few days), and was in the middle of mopping my bedroom floor when Caterina strolls out of bed about noon. First she asks me if Leone had done his homework, and I said I'd been helping him with it all morning and that he was doing the italian portion right now. Then she asks if I fed Rosa and I said I had. Then she asks if I'd vacuumed the living room floor. What? No, I hadn't vacuumed the living room floor. It's not my job to vacuum the living room floor. “Why doesn't she ask the cleaning lady (who is standing 5 feet from us) if she had vacuumed the floor?” I thought. Caterina begins harassing me about vacuuming the floor when I tell her “Look, what do you expect from me? I've been up since 9 cleaning and tutoring and working nonstop since I woke up. If you want me to vacuum the floor I'll do it but that means I won't help Leone with his homework or scrub my bathroom floor, or do something else that I'm supposed to be doing.” Caterina basically ended the conversation as gracefully as she could right there. Then a few minutes later, she takes me aside to another room and closes the door. The first thing she says is “Jimmy if you ever talk back to me like that again, then five minutes later you're gone.” I don't say anything back because I'm too speechless. Then she says something completely out of nowhere about how whenever she leaves the house she tells everyone where she is going so there's no confusion. “What??” Then she mentions that I've spent the last few days in Florence and how I got a raise and how that means I'm supposed to be working more. I tell her the same thing I told her a few minutes ago that I'd been working constantly since I woke up. Then she randomly asks me when I'm leaving for Christmas. I tell her the 16th and she flips out. I told her that I booked the flight after she told me not to come back after Christmas, and I wasn't going to spend several extra hundred dollars to stay until the 22nd when I wasn't even coming back. Then I asked her if I was coming back or not, because she told me not to, but Alessandro gave me a raise and I was confused. She responded with “Jimmy, I told you I don't want to talk about this anymore!” And I said “What? We haven't talked about anything since last Sunday when you told me to not come back! Just answer the question please, yes or no, am I coming back after Christmas?” and she said “Alessandro gets back tomorrow. You ask him whether or not you're coming back.”
So that was Saturday. Today is now Sunday. Last night I went to Florence and ate another delicious yufka kebab (I'm addicted!) and then met Fabio aand some of his friends at a happenin' night club. One of his friends, a man named Dominico, who is apparently involved with the fashion world somehow, listened as I described my plight to him. He gave me his phone number and told me to call him on Monday because he was sure he had a job for me. Another one of Fabio's friend's, a man named Ori might also have a job for me editing a magazine for tourists. Frank and Darshani said before they left that their friend might have a job for me as well. We'll see if any of these actually pan out though. I'm not holding my breath. I'm not coming back after Christmas though, no matter what Alessandro says. I can't stand living with this woman who screams at me so much. This woman who is never happy no matter what I do. I really want to stay in Italy because I like it here and I've already made some really good friends. Finding a job will be difficult, though. I guess we'll see how it turns out in the next few days.
Exactly one week ago today, I got fired because I couldn't find the cheese. Caterina had told me to grate some parmesan cheese up for dinner and I didn't see the wedge of parmesan nestled in with the other 21343697 kinds of cheese the Sonninos keep in a plastic tupperware container in the fridge. After Caterina successfully found the cheese herself, she says to me “Jimmy, when I tell you to find the cheese, you keep looking until you find the cheese! You know what? I think that after Christmas, you just don't come back.”
And that was that. The ironic part is that literally 10 minutes after this happened, Caterina couldn't find the brand new stick of butter laying in plain sight in the door of the refridgerator, but unlike not being able to find the cheese, not finding butter is a completely understandable mistake that anyone could make. But that is neither here nor there. The point is, she told me to not come back and I am actually pretty OK with that. It's not like this job is the best thing that's ever happened to me. But that was back when things were simple. I formulated a great plan. I was going to buy a one-way ticket home leaving on the 16th of December (Caterina wanted me to stay until the 22nd, but there's no way I'm paying several hundred extra dollars to make her happy...), and I would just search as hard as I could for a new job from now until the day my flight leaves. If I find something else, great, I'll take it and be ecstatic. If not, well then I'll have to go home and think of something else to do.
Tuesday night, after I'd cooked dinner and cleaned up from dinner and put the kids to bed and helped Leone with his homework and cleaned up all the messes they'd made in the living room and computer room, and straightened the cushions on the couch (Caterina has rage blackouts if the cushions aren't straight) and prepared a tray of cereal and biscuits and fresh fruit and bowls and spoons for the next morning so that I could focus all my energy in the morning into dragging Leone from his bed, Caterina casually asks me if I would take the kids to school the next day and then come back to the house to help the cleaning lady do her job. Now, normally, I do this kind of thing all the time. Not because it's my job but because I was foolish enough to think that if I broke my back working for Caterina maybe she'd actually be happy with me. However, having been fired for not finding the cheese, I wasn't much in the mood to work 11 or 12 hour days anymore. My attitude was basically “To hell with this job and this crazy woman.” So... I told her no. I told her that it's not my job to help the cleaning lady clean, which is true. It's only my job to clean up after myself and the kid's immediate messes (I didn't know this until a few days ago when I asked Anna, the lady who found me this job, what exactly was written in my contract about my work. She said I wasn't responsible for cleaning the house everyday or for cleaning/ironing/putting away the children's clothes. I've been helping the cleaning lady clean almost everyday for the past month instead of spending the school hours in Florence like I was promised I'd be able to before I came here). I told her that I had been working 11 and 12 hour days without breaks or thank you's, and that I had the work log I'd created a few weeks ago to prove it. I told her that I felt abused, exploited, and unappreciated. I told her that she never made one single effort to make me feel like a part of the family, that she didn't do anything for my birthday, that she never invited me along on family trips. She didn't even tell me when the family dog died, a dog that I had been caring for, taking to the vet everyday, holding him up so he could use the bathroom and eat (because he was too weak to do on his this on his own) for his last dying weeks. I told her that I hadn't had more than a few scattered, random days in Florence in the past month and a half, and that I needed the day in Florence to find a job before she ruined my life. Finally, after all this she screamed "FINE! Stay in Florence for the day!!" and stomped off like a little girl whose parents wouldn't buy her the lollipop she wanted.
Then things got really weird. I had a nice day in Florence, I saw this amazing church, Santa Maria Novella, and ate at Mesopotamia Kebab, the best kebabs this side of the Euphrates. It was a great day, but I was expecting to come home to find my suitcase on the street in front of the house. Instead, everything was eerily calm. I managed to avoid Caterina for most of the day. Then, that night after I'd made dinner and was cleaning up all the dishes, Alessandro approaches me. He says “Jimmy, you work really hard for this family. How about a raise? How does 700 euro per month instead of 500 sound?” I told him it sounded terrible and he laughed and I was left bewildered, but, for the first time since I've been here, feeling really appreciated. However, I am now too untrusting of this family to just take the interaction for face value. I think that either a) Caterina doesn't remember firing me (rage blackout) and the threat of me finding a new job made them realize that with Frank, Darshani, and me all gone, they would actually have to do things for themselves which is a fate worse than death so they offered me a bribe to stay, b) Alessandro actually meant what he said and they didn't realize how hard I'd been working until I screamed it at Caterina, or c) they wanted to intice me to stick around until they could find a replacement. I think it's some combination of A and C. But at the moment, I didn't care. It's a considerable raise!
Then, on Saturday morning, I woke up at 9 am to help around the house, even though Saturday is supposed to be something of a day off (but really it's like “Jimmy, do this and this and take Leone to his friend's house and then once he's gone you can do whatever you want”), I was feeling helpful and I knew that if Leone and his friend who had spent the night had to make their own cereal there would be hell to pay, day off or not. So I woke up, cleaned my bathroom and bedroom, made breakfast for the boys, helped Leone with his homework, took out the trash, fed Rosa (don't get me started on how ridiculously well the dog eats. Feeding her doesn't consist of pouring dog food into a bowl like it does everywhere else in the world. Let's just say it involves pots, pans, and raw hamburger meat which has to be bought from the butcher every few days), and was in the middle of mopping my bedroom floor when Caterina strolls out of bed about noon. First she asks me if Leone had done his homework, and I said I'd been helping him with it all morning and that he was doing the italian portion right now. Then she asks if I fed Rosa and I said I had. Then she asks if I'd vacuumed the living room floor. What? No, I hadn't vacuumed the living room floor. It's not my job to vacuum the living room floor. “Why doesn't she ask the cleaning lady (who is standing 5 feet from us) if she had vacuumed the floor?” I thought. Caterina begins harassing me about vacuuming the floor when I tell her “Look, what do you expect from me? I've been up since 9 cleaning and tutoring and working nonstop since I woke up. If you want me to vacuum the floor I'll do it but that means I won't help Leone with his homework or scrub my bathroom floor, or do something else that I'm supposed to be doing.” Caterina basically ended the conversation as gracefully as she could right there. Then a few minutes later, she takes me aside to another room and closes the door. The first thing she says is “Jimmy if you ever talk back to me like that again, then five minutes later you're gone.” I don't say anything back because I'm too speechless. Then she says something completely out of nowhere about how whenever she leaves the house she tells everyone where she is going so there's no confusion. “What??” Then she mentions that I've spent the last few days in Florence and how I got a raise and how that means I'm supposed to be working more. I tell her the same thing I told her a few minutes ago that I'd been working constantly since I woke up. Then she randomly asks me when I'm leaving for Christmas. I tell her the 16th and she flips out. I told her that I booked the flight after she told me not to come back after Christmas, and I wasn't going to spend several extra hundred dollars to stay until the 22nd when I wasn't even coming back. Then I asked her if I was coming back or not, because she told me not to, but Alessandro gave me a raise and I was confused. She responded with “Jimmy, I told you I don't want to talk about this anymore!” And I said “What? We haven't talked about anything since last Sunday when you told me to not come back! Just answer the question please, yes or no, am I coming back after Christmas?” and she said “Alessandro gets back tomorrow. You ask him whether or not you're coming back.”
So that was Saturday. Today is now Sunday. Last night I went to Florence and ate another delicious yufka kebab (I'm addicted!) and then met Fabio aand some of his friends at a happenin' night club. One of his friends, a man named Dominico, who is apparently involved with the fashion world somehow, listened as I described my plight to him. He gave me his phone number and told me to call him on Monday because he was sure he had a job for me. Another one of Fabio's friend's, a man named Ori might also have a job for me editing a magazine for tourists. Frank and Darshani said before they left that their friend might have a job for me as well. We'll see if any of these actually pan out though. I'm not holding my breath. I'm not coming back after Christmas though, no matter what Alessandro says. I can't stand living with this woman who screams at me so much. This woman who is never happy no matter what I do. I really want to stay in Italy because I like it here and I've already made some really good friends. Finding a job will be difficult, though. I guess we'll see how it turns out in the next few days.
posted by J.B.K. at 5:54 PM
3 Comments:
One of two things must be true.
1. You are a compulsive liar, and are not a good influence on leone, or,
2. You are living with a nut, and should not continue to abuse yourself any longer by sticking around.
On the assumption that 2 is correct, I would say that you have put up with more than your fare share of crap from this family, and I think you are right to leave and go and find something that at least doesn't consist of Jimmerella scrubbing the floors all day.
Also, on the assumption that 2 is correct,... so much of this post would be so funny if it wernt true.... lol... i had to take a break for a moment to laugh when you were describing the dogs food.
anywho.... keep us posted... and more frequently too.
i LOVE sta maria novella. amazing. really one of my favorites.
sorry things are tough. but i would rather be dealing with tough things there, than tough things here. good luck with it all. it will end up working out better than you could have ever imagined. i like reading your blog.
Get out of there.
you only live once, and can find something better than dealing with some ugly witch.
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